Hello, all. How have you been? I missed you! I have been very busy. I will post some pictures later in the week.
Just wanted to say, I did draw for the Dr. Seuss giveaway and Deanna won! If I don't hear from her by the end of the week I will draw again.
Thanks for all the nice comments.
This next part borders on potty humor. So, stop if you have delicate sensibilities.
Still reading? Okay, I am having a colonoscopy in about four hours. If you have had one you know what I have been doing for the past day and a half. If you have not, let me just say they want that thing EMPTY and washed clean before they go in.
People get disturbed by colonoscopies. I tell you, it is no big deal. I never remember anything about it. The prep - that is another story. This is my fifth one. My dad has had colon cancer twice. I had a problem in my mid 30s that prompted my first. No cancer, but polyps. Every time they find them I have to come back in three years. Then, I had to complicate it by developing uterine sarcoma. Doctors are REAL interested in what happens inside of me. Seems someone is always scanning or probing me. But, I digress.
It is amazing to me that my caller ID says my phone had not rung since Thursday until I started this prep. All I have to do to get phone calls is take up residence in my bathroom. Last night at 7:00 p.m. I got called and asked to come to work. It is a 30 minute drive. At that point I couldn't even make the drive let alone work. Could I come in for just a little while? Umm...NO!
Ten minutes ago I had just walked out of my current private lodging and the phone rang. The dentist office had cancellations and would I come in today? Ummm....NO!
Apparently, ingesting the equivalent of a month's worth of laxatives in 6 hours is what it takes to make my presence desirable. I have been told I am full of s@#% on more than one occasion and this may prove it.
I really think I am at the point I would just prefer I go in, they knock me out and everyone do every test and exam they need to while I am there. Then, I can wake up, EAT, and be done for 6 months or so. I get really focused on getting to eat as soon as possible when this is done. My husband says I am embarrassing and grumpy. We negotiated food last night but I am changing my mind already. When I got out of bed this morning I had lost 7lbs since yesterday morning. Considering I am in my "ideal" weight range - okay, at the top of it but I am in it! - that is a considerable amount of weight. No wonder I am hungry!
I also detest Gatorade. I swear I won't drink it again until the next colonoscopy. Cross your fingers that this one is clean and I get to go 5 years. Then I would be in my 50s like normal people.
Back to my oasis.
Mary
p.s. I grew up without indoor plumbing. It is and always has been my favorite modern convenience. In the past 24 hours I have thanked God multiple times for the gift of a heated bathroom with modern plumbing. I love my porcelain!
ROFLMAO! I have had one colonoscopy so I can appreciate your lovely description. Nothing like hugging your toilet to really build a bond that lasts a lifetime, eh?! Hope everything comes out okay...*snort* sorry, I couldn't resist!
ReplyDeleteOh, Mary, you have my sympathy! I have had several colonoscopies,and I HATE it! As you say, the test itself is nothing, but the preparation is close to hellish. "Grumpy" doesn't come close to describing me--I am downright anti-social! Hope your results are good and you get a long wait till the next one!
ReplyDeleteNo long wait - three years - but results were good. No precancerous polyps this time! Used a different anesthesia and I recovered better this time. Far less grumpy and mean.
DeleteThanks for thinking of me.
Glad to hear everything went okay. I know what you mean about eating. I found out, on my way to go to lunch, that I was in labor with my first. I think my biggest concern was when they were going to let me eat something -- luckily I was only in labor 2 1/2 hours! :-)
ReplyDelete